Baring the Truth
by Biancquiller
Summary: Just a short story where Shepard realizes that her feelings for Garrus are too strong to be just friendship.
1. Chapter 1

**This is just a short story that I had to get off my chest (it probably won't be more than two or three small chapters) because I loved the Garrus/Shepard romance, but wanted to make it unfold in the way I imagined it would. **

**All belongs to BioWare.**

**Please enjoy, I hope!**

"More up ahead." Shepard yelled, propelling herself backwards and away from the half dozen snarling beasts that were tearing towards her.

They were fucking fast, and Shepard's heart pounded so quickly she couldn't tell where one beat ended and another began. Entering the trance like state that took over in combat she aimed her gun and sent a volley of shots at them, taking the first two down and wounding the next. A brilliantly aimed shot to the head from either Garrus or Grunt from behind her felled another, and then they were upon her.

The remaining three of them swarmed at Shepard; boxing in her arms and rendering her riffle as useless as a stick. Desperately twisting herself away from their three rows of glistening fangs, Shepard butted at them with her riffle, her elbows, and her knees. Throwing as much force as she possibly could into all of her attacks.

Fortunately Shepard could muster quite a lot of force; long years of training as a soldier had infused her limbs with muscles like steel.

After a struggle that felt endless, infinite, but probably lasted minutes at most, during which Shepard felt her amour twist and buckle as the beasts bit and scraped their claws at it, she'd landed blows to two throats and a skull.

Fatal blows. As the beasts fell away from her Shepard whipped her head around and saw the others finishing off another pack that had come up behind them. She shuddered, not from fear or disgust, but from the thrill of battle. Adrenaline coursed through her, thrilling every one of her senses.

In moments like these Shepard thanked God that there were always battles lining up before her, just causes to champion; because she knew that even if there wasn't a single creature that deserved death in the galaxy, she'd still need to fight. Need to kill. Need to get that rush that nothing but a fight for your life could provide.

"Thanks for the help," she called across at Garrus.

He gave his bark like laugh. "You look like you handled them just fine."

Shepard grinned; he wasn't her best fighter by a long shot, but she never felt quite right on the field without Garrus there to exchange quips and banter with her.

Most people clamed up in battle, like their personalities had shut down.

Shepard was the opposite, her emotions blazed. It was when she was off the field that she'd lose her liveliness, turning serious, even sullen.

Compared with the thrill of life and death, the everyday dramas in life felt meaningless to the point of being unbearable.

When she'd first met Garrus, with his thirst for action and frustration at the confines of politics, despite his alien appearance Shepard had known she'd met a like mind.

It wasn't a matter they'd ever spoken about, but Shepard knew that Garrus understood her better than almost anybody….

They were currently on Tuchanka, helping Grunt with his rite.

Shepard couldn't say she minded: She liked Grunt, and Krogan's were one of her favorite spices to deal with, never mincing words. And they could take a threat and then throw it right back at you.

Plus the area was packed with stuff she could salvage, Shepard noted with satisfaction as she scanned it.

The coast seemed clear for the moment, so with a quick explanation to Garrus and Grunt Shepard headed off to collect what she could.

Garrus shook his head, "oh of course."

"It's useful." She called back at him defensively.

"It sure is. But I wonder what your troops would say if they were here to see their commander scavenging through an old battle field?"

Shepard ignored him. Garrus liked to give her crap about her habit of splitting her focus between fighting and scouring areas for useful resources and credits while out on the field. So did most of her Squad members for that matter. But she didn't like the idea of leaving something potentially valuable just lying there.

She checked that the field was still clear, and then jogged over to a safe on one of the walls. It was protected by a security system, and in a few moments Shepard was deeply absorbed scanning through it's blocks of text in an attempt to hack it.

Through practice Shepard had become a pretty good hacker by anyone's standards, and had come to quite enjoy the process; with each piece of information she manipulated correctly she felt the tension that constantly resided in her shoulders ease slightly.

She was almost finished when Shepard heard gun shots from behind her. Unable to bring herself to abort her hacking she cursed and sped up her figures, finishing hastily and then spinning around and sprinting back in the direction she'd come from.

Shepard reached the others just in time to see Grunt charging at another pack of the beasts while Garrus fired at them from where he was crouched behind a fallen slab of stone.

Following his example Shepard flung herself out of sight before using her riffle to pick off the beasts that were scuffling with Grunt.

Then glancing up Shepard felt her guts lurch uneasily, half a dozen of the beasts had crept around and were approached Garrus from behind.

"Garrus. Cover your damn arse!" She bellowed over the gun fire, her arms moving to take aim automatically so that by the time she'd finished yelling one of them already lay dead.

Whipping around Garrus felled another two with a pair of clean shots through the head, and then the remaining three were on him.

Shepard cursed as she watched him grapple with them: If she took another shot it could easily hit him. She felt more irritated by her own ineffectiveness than worried about Garrus as she watched them. She had no doubt at all that he could handle himself.

This conviction made it come as even more of a shock to her when one of the beasts suddenly sliced through the armor of Garrus' chest plate with its teeth.

A moment later its fur had been dyed red.

Shepard felt as though time had ground to a halt around her, freezing her body and rendering her motionless, while simultaneously speeding up around Garrus, causing the blood to spray out of the wound in his chest at a frenzied pace.

Something agonizing clawed through her own chest, as though she had a wound to mirror his.

The lack of control Shepard had over her own limbs as they raced her out of hiding and towards Garrus would have terrified her if she'd noticed.

But she didn't notice, not even as she crushed the remaining beasts around Garrus with her bare hands.

All Shepard could see was the blood as it poured out of her closest friend.

Far too much blood.

Any combat veteran knew how much blood a body held, and the amount drenching the ground around Garrus was enough that Shepard knew there wouldn't be any left in his body soon.

His eyes were closed, and his face was almost pure white as Shepard poured all the medi-gel she was carrying over him, only the faintest hint of blue lingered around his neck and in the hollows of his eyes.

As Garrus lay there, and as Shepard crouched over him, Grunt straightened his shoulders and continued to fight alone. Even in the brief remissions between waves of enemies he didn't approach them.

He felt it would be disrespectful of him to acknowledge his usually tough as nails commander while she was shuddering like child over her alien friend who she cared so much for, probably not even aware of the tears that were flooding down over her face.

X

The time it took to get Garrus back to the Normandy felt like an eternity; and each moment of it was agonizing as Shepard watched the life blood leak out of his poorly healed wounds.

Something in the beast's saliva had reacted badly with the medi-gel, impairing its healing properties.

It wasn't until she brought Garrus to Doctor Chakwas, who frowned at the sight of him and sped him away without a seconds delay, that Shepard allowed herself to slump down onto the floor, feeling more emotionally drained than she had since Cerberus had brought her back to life.

She refused to accept the possibility that he might die, she'd lost too much already. She couldn't lose her best friend.

The thought of what it'd be like if he died fixed into her head before she could stop it, and her throat and eyes both instantly burnt with tears.

Startled by the strength of her own emotions Shepard growled at herself harshly. _Pull yourself together you bloody moron_. She couldn't afford to break down like this in the middle of the ship, in clear sight of her crew; it would be a Goddamn disaster for moral.

Shepard drew a deep breath, then another, firmly shutting away her emotions, cutting them off to be dealt with later.

It worked well enough to allow her to raise herself up off the ground, and fixing her face into what she hoped was a semblance of composure Shepard made her way to the conference room to report to the Illusive Man.

After that she made rounds of the crew, researched upgrades and oversaw the launching of several new probes: Anything that might distract her.

An increasingly clamorous part of her was demanding that she go and check on Garrus, but Shepard ignored it with an iron first. Seeing him now wasn't going to improve his chances, and would only make her more screwed up if he ended up dead.

Shepard kept herself surrounded by other people who forced her to maintain a collected façade, only allowing herself to go to her rooms when she was practically asleep on her feet.

But after collapsing into bed Shepard couldn't fall asleep. Repressed thoughts swirled around the corners of her mind no matter how hard she tried to clear them away, making her grit her teeth with frustration. Eventually Shepard gave up and crept out of her quarters and down through the ship to the medical lab.

**Apologies for any typos!**

**(Any constructive criticism, and of course all reviews, are highly appreciated!)**


	2. Chapter 2

The lights in the medical lab were dimmed but Doctor Chakwas was still awake, Garrus was still out of it and she was sitting by him with a data pad balanced on her knees. She glanced up as Shepard entered, looking unsurprised.

Shepard lingered by the door, feeling suddenly reluctant to see Garrus. Once she did she'd have to accept that he was hurt all over again, losing the limited protection that her denial had provided over the past few hours.

Doctor Chakwas seemed to understand and didn't try disturbing her.

In the end it was Shepard's pride that settled the matter; she decided there was no way in hell she was going to slink back to her rooms like a dog with its tail between its legs, and made her way over to where Garrus was lying.

He was still shockingly pale.

She'd expected him to look like he was asleep, Shepard realized. But he didn't. His cheeks were too hollow, and the planes of his face stood out more harshly than usual.

"What's the diagnosis?" Shepard heard herself ask. A small part of her mind registered with surprise that her voice could adopt its usual direct manner when her mind felt like it was under assault.

Doctor Chakwas paused, and when she replied her voice was serious. "His wounds were very close to his heart, I've healed the damage but he won't last without more blood, and I don't think he'll be able to replace it either, too much was lost. Cerberus can get us a transfusion of Turian blood, but that'll take at least half a day. Everything depends on whether Garrus can hang on till then."

Shepard didn't reply, but as Chakwas spoke her hand drifted down to stroke Garrus' face. As she brushed her figures against his cheek she realized abstractly that she'd never touched his skin directly before.

It felt as rough as it looked, but was unexpectedly warm; far warmer than her own skin.

As she watched them Chakwas' face creased with sympathy. She felt strangely like an intruder in her own lab. "I'm going to fall asleep right here on this chair if I don't go to bed soon Shepard. If you want to take over…"

Shepard nodded without looking up from Garrus, and after watching them for another moment Chakwas eased herself out of the lab. "Call me at once if anything changes Shepard," she instructed as she left.

As she settled down in the chair Doctor Chakwas had just abandoned and watched her old friend it struck Shepard how out of character this was; she'd never been the type to hang around in a situation when there was nothing she could do to improve it.

The numbness in her mind was gradually fading away, leaving a growing sense of panic in its place.

There was a chance she'd lose Garrus: A real chance.

It began to sink in how alone she'd be if that happened. Not that he was her only friend; there were other people she could talk to, but not in the same way.

It was shocking how dependent she'd grow on him without even noticing. Garrus had always been that one companion she could rely upon; dependable. Stable enough not to leave and skilled enough not to die, or so she'd thought.

A sudden flare on anger passed through Shepard. How the hell had Garrus let a couple of wolf mutts bring him down like that?

She thought back to the fight; her memory had stored it as a sequence of images. The beasts sneaking up on Garrus. Warning Garrus. Shooting a beast for him as he shot down two for himself. Exchanging a quick grin as he gave her a look of thanks…..

Her stomach plunged, had she distracted him?

It was possible. They'd been getting too complacent during their battles together, turning them into a game.

Getting reckless.

Shepard sighed deeply and buried her head in her hands.

The combined guilt and anxiety were exhausting in a way all the physical exertion she'd put herself through earlier wasn't, and before she realized it Shepard had fallen deeply asleep where she sat.

Chakwas' alarm went off a few hours later, signaling the arrival of Garrus' blood transfusion. As she passed through the medical lab she paused at the site of her Commander slumped forward in her seat, her forehead resting heavily against the side of Garrus' infirmary bed.

She felt a little bite moved as she watched them, not enough that she didn't feel a flicker of irritation at Shepard's carelessness in falling asleep when she'd left her on watch, but enough that she didn't try disturbing her when she returned later and attached the transfusion to Garrus' IV.

In all the time she'd know her Commander Chakwas had seen her be many things; ruthless, strong, fierce, loyal…. But slumped besides Garrus she looked almost vulnerable. And that was a first.

X

As Shepard stirred awake her mind slowly registered that she wasn't in her bed, the lower half of her face had gone numb and with a small groan she pulled herself up, looking around blearily.

Then she heard a soft chuckle.

Garrus' chuckle.

A shot of adrenaline washed through her as memories from yesterday leapt into her mind, waking her up instantly.

"Garrus." She gasped springing to her feet.

He was almost himself again; still a little pale, but at least he'd lost the shrunken look he'd had lying there yesterday.

The flood of warmth that rushed through Shepard felt better than any battle kick, and without thinking she reached down and clasped one of his hands in both her own.

Garrus looked surprised, but made no objection.

They remained like that for a while, enjoying the moment, and Shepard could feel an idiotic grin on her face as the fact that Garrus was going to be ok sunk in.

"It was a surprise to see you here Shepard. But it's not a bad way to wake up." Garrus said finally, his voice gentler than usual.

Realizing she was still holding his hand Shepard dropped it hastily and stepped back.

"I thought my best tactician was about to die on me before we'd even reached the collectors."

"I see" murmured Garrus.

Shepard sensed she'd hurt his feelings. "And my friend," she offered awkwardly.

"I see," he repeated, but he was smiling.

Garrus paused for a moment before adding. "Sorry about that."

Glancing at him Shepard realized he was referring to the battle. It'd be a lie if she said she wasn't tempted to scold him for it, since he'd given her the chance, but that wasn't her style so Shepard resisted the urge and dismissed his apology with a shrug.

"Just don't expect to live it down any time soon."

Garrus groaned. "Of course not."

"The great Archangel…." Shepard mocked with a grin.

"But really Garrus," she continued seriously. "It beats me how a couple of mutt wolves could throw you on your arse like that."

Garrus shrugged, he didn't quite meet her eyes as he did so, but Shepard decided not to push the matter.

"Well if you're sure you're not going to die on me, then I should probably go Garrus. Let you get some rest."

He pulled a face. "Don't go doing any of the fun missions without me."

Shepard chuckled and was almost out of the room when he called after her. "Thanks for hanging around Shepard, while I was out of it. I appreciate it."

Feeling strangely warm in the face Shepard replied without turning around, "you're a good friend Garrus, it was the least I could do." Then wincing at her own sappiness added quickly. "Just don't go making a habit of it."


End file.
